It’s hard to give things up. We’ve done things a certain way for a long time and change is rather difficult. For an introvert, it’s no different. However, there are certain things introverts do that can “hold us” back from being exceptional. For example, introverts like to do things independently (guilty) or we hold back from breaking out of the mold simply because we like comfort.
I remember when I embarked on a journey of constant improvement. I learned about it in Jeff Olson’s book “The Slight Edge“. I learned that compound change over a period of time can have a profound affect on my life. All I had to do was to start with something (regardless if it is small) and continue to change just a bit more the next day, then the next, and so on and so forth. Then within a year’s period I would have made a 180 degree change. And, the change wasn’t just to be different but to… Bring Out the Good
10 things I eventually gave up to be an exceptional introvert
1. Procrastination – yes this one was really hard and took me some time to finally get rid of. Sure there are times I procrastinate but these days I do it far less than I used to. I have learned that procrastinating holds me back and creates more stress for me – which I don’t like.
2. Excuses – have you ever spent more time coming up with an entire list of reasons why you shouldn’t do something versus the amount of time of you just “doing it” would take you? Well, I did that quite a bit. The realization for me was if it was going to do something I knew I was capable of (introvert and all) why not spend the time in doing it instead of wasting my energy on making excuses.
3. Fear of loss – this one has run in my blood for who knows how long. I operated from “if I do this certain something I am going to fail”. It was a terrible place to live from. I once heard this story about a surveyed group of elderly people on their death bed and the one thing they said they wish they would have done differently was to take more risks. They regretted not going after what they wanted. That was enough for me to realize if I am going to live on this planet, why not make the best of it – so I decided to not let fear of loss dictate how I was going to live my life.
4. Negative beliefs – this is another hard one if you’re life is surrounded with negative things. Those negative things are like the news, toxic friends, Debby Downers, etc. For me I had to do a cleanse and let go of any negative beliefs and focused on what I was grateful for. Which by the way took quite some time to do and I still have to remind myself to do to this today. Secondly, I had to limit the input of negative things in my life. With the combination of both of these, I put my negative beliefs off to the side and spend more time on the positive side.
5. Fear of succeeding – the old “what would I do if I do succeed”. This one is very similar to fear of loss the only difference here is I knew I would succeed but how would I I continue to be successful. I had to get real with my beliefs and determine what was more important to me. If there was one thing that I was afraid of succeeding at I had to ask myself if that was even important to me anyhow. Heck, if it wasn’t then I didn’t even need to worry about it all. However, if it was important to me than I needed to focus more on what I do I need to do now. My focus become on the “present moment” and I let everything else go.
6. Doubt – ever thought you weren’t going to be any good at something? I had doubt with many things. I didn’t know how I was going to change my life and set a good example for my family, children, wife, and friends. I had to let go of doubt and just be the person I wanted to be. I focused on one area at time that I wanted to be better at. I didn’t have time to doubt myself because I wanted to make an impact. Therefore, my only option was “to do” and nothing else. I had put doubt in its place.
7. Being who you are not – I had to give up that I didn’t want to be an introvert. I thought if I can be extroverted that not only can I be different (for the better) but great things can happen for me. I had no idea how wrong I was. I didn’t know that I could be successful and be an introvert at the same time. When I ultimately excepted this, I found some things became easier and probably more so because I was no longer resisting. I was ok with being a hungry introvert.
8. Meaningless things – I had to give up on STUFF that no longer served me. I am constantly evaluating the things in my life and eliminating them where they are no longer needed. Getting rid of the useless creates new opportunities to come into my life.
9. Bad friends – toxic friends can be the worst. Thankfully I had great friends. However, I did have some bad/toxic acquaintances that if I choose to continue being around them my life was going to spiral out of control and NOT in the direction I wanted to take it. So, I had to make a choice to limit my time with them and/or move on. Now, if they were close friends I can imagine that it will be that simple to move on (I know that would be hard for me). However, you could limit your time with them.
10. Holding back – introverts are great at working within their confines (I know because I do this) however, if you can push yourself (event just a little bit) you can experience a different side to your life. I remember doing this in my career. I was seeking change, more pay, more responsibility. BUT, with this “more” meant I had to interact more. As I weighed my options, for me I wanted this change bad enough and I didn’t want anything to hold me back. Thankfully I found ways how I can embrace my inner introvert all while pushing myself.
So, there you have it. 10 profound things you can give up so you can be an exceptional introvert.
Do you have things you have given up?
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